


always,

by imperiality



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Letters, No Plot/Plotless
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2019-07-04
Packaged: 2020-06-03 16:09:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19467460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imperiality/pseuds/imperiality
Summary: it's a peice of dumpster fire but its my piece of dumpster fire





	always,

_Dear Allura,_

_I've been trapped inside this house all day. Well, that's not true. I went to work and everything but I don't think that counts._

_I guess here's where you'd say it totally counts, or it doesn't have to count, or at least I did something. I don't want being "at least" being enough anymore. I don't know how you can stand it._

_Actually, you don't. You're always out trying new things and making yourself better. You're always trying to better me, too. I know that sounds like I'm complaining, but I don't think I can ever thank you enough._

_Anyway, I'm really writing to tell you I'm going to that camp in a couple of weeks. You know, the one Shiro roped me into. All I'm doing is strapping kids into harnesses for the zipline, but he keeps trying to sell it like I'm doing the Lord's work. I'm trying really hard to be excited for the kids, for him... and I guess I am. But. Not really... At all._

_I don't know what's wrong with me, Allura. I used to be way more excited about this kind of stuff. You'd think I'd be bored of the wilderness by now because of that stint with my dad where we lived in the desert, but I don't miss the silence. I miss the sunrise, I even miss that stupid shack and that stupid generator. All I have are memories of that place. I can only feel them fading the more time I spend in the city._

_Maybe it's the kids part that I'm actually freaking out about. Forget the desert- it's been forever since I've had to put up with a kid for more than 10 minutes, let alone get them to like me._

_It's all I ever wanted to do, though._

_I know Allura, that nothing can ever really replace my mom, but when she left us I was always left wondering why did she really leave? What if she hadn't? What if dad remarried? Was there anything I could have done? I know I never wanted another kid to have those same questions I did, or feel the way I felt. I thought if I could love anything or anyone at all, it would be the kid that hadn't had it at all._

_Right. Here's where you'd say I just have too much love in my heart to give._

_Going to this camp is... it's kind of... actually everything I ever wanted. It's the only way I can think of right now how I can give back. (Yes, you're right. Shiro didn't have to do all that much roping.) But still. Beyond the zipline, I'm probably never going to see these kids again. Right now this is all I can think to do, and of course it isn't enough._

_What if I do it wrong? What if I snap at one of them? WHAT IF ONE OF THEM STARTS TO CRY._

_See!! This is why I need you for this!_

_I know. I know. I'm stopping over-thinking now. I just want to believe that I'm actually going to do a some-what okay job with this. I need to believe that everything's going to be okay._

_Always,_

KK

**Author's Note:**

> it's a peice of dumpster fire but its my piece of dumpster fire


End file.
